#92 The Myth of Universal Approach

How do YOU manage tough emotions like anger, sadness, or frustration?

In Shift: Managing Your Emotions – So They Don’t Manage You, psychologist and neuroscientist Ethan Kross offers evidence-backed strategies for taking more control over our emotions.

He also reveals a widespread misperception: “I call it 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘮𝘺𝘵𝘩 𝘰𝘧 𝘶𝘯𝘪𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘢𝘭 𝘢𝘱𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘢𝘤𝘩 – the idea that we should always confront, express, and process our difficult feelings because avoiding them prolongs the agony, perpetuating our distress.”

Instead, Kross suggests it can make sense to initially turn away from distressing situations, as emotional intensity fades with time.

He emphasizes flexibility – allowing yourself to shift your attention and distract yourself when needed, while knowing when to revisit such situations and feelings.

Kross also provides this (somewhat surprising) reassurance: “If something doesn’t keep cropping up, there’s a good chance you’re 𝘯𝘰𝘵 harboring some invisible wound that will fester and ruin your life decades down the road.”